MOVIES, NOVELS, MUSIC, LETTERS & SCRIPTURE

Prior to now I shared the story of what’s gone on before in my life, I also shared summarily on where I am presently.  Today I’d be sharing a few things that helped me through the valley and are still presently helping me even as I write. In the meantime pardon my hiatus, hopefully it won’t happen again. Well here are those things

MOVIES:
Can we all take a minute and say a prayer for the Kendrick brothers, Mount Zion faith films Nigeria and every other child of God who has decided to make movies to glorify their God and help others find this God. You see I learnt how to play God games at a very tender age after been molested and seeing my abuser praying to God like he did nothing I figured we had the right to live anyhow we deemed everyday so long as we could pray in the spirit on Sunday. I was a PK so naturally I was in the forefront at church attending youth group, singing in the choir and even acting drama in church all the while totally out of tune with God. Then I became sick and I started to see my real need for God, how much I needed to get God in me. I wouldn’t speak of it but I was searching, I tried scriptures but I felt disconnected, I didn’t even know where to start then one night I watched the movie “THE ENCOUNTER” totally amazed that there were Christian movies like that io started to haunt for Christian movies and I got a ton, one after the other I watched them, saw people like myself going through so much and seeing how they overcame, I’d jot the scriptures quoted in these movies, read them myself, I’d cry watching these movies and gradually I started to heal.


NOVELS:
Francine River’s atonement child was my turning point, in the atonement child the key character was a young lady who loved God, she was raped and her seeming perfect life was turned upside down what struck me in the book was when an analogy was made about sifting. So in sickness I realized that God had great use for me, but to fulfill it there had to be a sifting of all excesses and all those things that shouldn’t be present in my life. One thing that came to mind was pap before pap is made guinea corn in first soaked in water, it’s then grinded and then its sifted for the useful part to come out. All I had to go through was my own processing, so that I’d be able to speak and speak loud when its time. I remember reading Karen Kingsbury’s Beyond Tuesday morning so many lesson were learnt there especially that I had to choose life, and choosing life included t giving closure to things that needed closure, so when things I had learnt to tell myself didn’t happen started haunting me, I had to realize I needed to choose life, hence I went back to it all, dealt with my pain, my inner demons one after the other. I knew I couldn’t do it all myself, God knew that too hence he gave me a confidant.


MUSIC:
There’s a power that lies behind music, weather godly or worldly music there’s a power that lies behind music, its why we must be mindful of what we listen to. Times I couldn’t find words to describe how exactly I always found a song that said exactly those things I wanted to say, so at every point in my struggle, for every season of pain, there was always a song to give me warmth, there was always a song to tell me I was not alone in my pain (lol yes, misery loves company). There was always a song reminding me to hold on, from Britt Nicole, to Jamie Grace, to Francesca, to Donnie and several more artists. When I couldn’t pray all I needed to do was put on my “song for the season” and I’d find new strength to pray, there were time I couldn’t pray and I’d just put on my song for the season on repeat and I’d get up and realize I’d prayed for two hours or even more. Music was truly a balm and for me.


LETTERS:
I used to find it really hart to express myself vocally, many times I cringed inwardly at the sound of my voice so I’d rather say very little, but when it came to God there was so much to say, I dint know how I’d speak to God with that my annoying voice, then I started to write. I’d write my prayer request, I’d write my feelings, I’d write out my struggle I’d just simply write, if someone said something I didn’t like I’d write it to God in my prayer Journal, I know God really did read my journal because he always helped me when I asked, and when I was hurt I always felt this comfort I couldn’t understand like someone was hugging away my pain. Gradually I started to speak more often and now I no longer cringe at my own voice, but once in a while when prayer gets too routine, I write letters to God. Another thigh I did was write letters to me. I had  developed a complex after all the blows life threw at me, I’d lap on random silly complements thrown my way like a thirsty dog; people would tell me “you’re not so ugly” and I’d be there grinning like a little mouse, but when I started writing letters I told myself all I needed to hear from other and yes I believed it and this helped me get of unnecessary and dysfunctional relationships which I’d stayed in because of words and complements and so I’ll feel like I was worth friendships, I’d write letters to myself and I’d read them days later ad blush like it was someone else who wrote them. Letters helped me find myself.


SCRIPTURES:
Yes scriptures! Now this is the most important one, now it wasn’t the first resort I went to but every other thing simply led me to scriptures, movies quoted scriptures and I went to the bible, books quoted scriptures and I went to the bible, music spoke about God and his promises and I had to check scriptures, scriptures reminded me to do the most important thing PRAY, I tried to pray and music helped me pray longer, I got tired of routine prayer and wrote letters to God, I needed validation and scriptures did just that for me, told me what God thought of me and I wrote God’s thoughts to myself and I felt better. All in all I’d say the scripture was everything and in God’s word I found my way to laugh, love and most importantly live, because God’s words are spirit and life.
p.s: Lets know things that have helped you through the valley! Share in the comment section. ❤




Love,
Opeyemi( the unspoken one)